journalist

WHO I AM?

I am a woman, mother of a beloved son, and a grandmother of his children.

Historical truth. Faith of nations in their own strength. Faith of Africa in its own potential and possibilities

We have to look deep into history. History is what tells us where we came from and where we are going. It is important in life and tells the story about our roots. We have a habit of destroying our own history, we say it’s not our story and we want to change it, to destroy our black history. But there is no black history. History is one. History cannot be changed. We were a colony; white people ruled here, they colonized us. That is sad. It is the fact. Why should we destroy it? We cannot change it. But we must understand this to work on the current way of thinking of the Africans because colonization had a huge impact on the thinking of Africans. In Africa, the white man’s word is more valued than that of the “black brother’s”. If a white man says something, it’s accepted as impeccable truth, if your black brother says it, it’s less important. This still exists. It has to stop. The education system of the colonizers was an ideology of white supremacy. So many years after the end of colonization, books on history remain unchanged in schools. Why should we not change it? Now something has changed. We should think seriously about Africa, about our land, about ourselves and we should change ourselves. 

Working together between men and women to build a good relationship. The patriarchal system must go away. Awareness of women

When we talk about the development of women, we only talk about women and the problems seen through their eyes Women must know their rights. But men also must be willing to change. Men are also under a lot of pressure – being a man. But what does it mean? Nobody helps them. On the other hand, they also have to help themselves. They should be human beings whether they are Christians or Muslims. When we talk about being human, religion does not matter. Being human in the sense of respecting everyone, including women, is shaped from very early in childhood. The mother and father must set an example from the beginning on how to have a good marriage. If the son beats his wife, the mother has to stop it. She shouldn’t allow it just because he’s her son. A woman brings up her son but educates him in the patriarchal system. From an early age, boys are allowed to play, to have fun. The girls are summoned to help their mothers. There are more prohibitions and duties for girls than is the case for boys. This is the beginning of shaping the psyche and attitudes. And who does it? The mother, not the father. All behaviour constituting our value system is taken out of the house. We cannot escape this. As long as the patriarchal system rules at home, it will stay in society until nobody knows when. Media must also speak in this matter. The churches, mosques should also join this movement. We should talk about it. When we look at who has more courage, men have it. Changes must be made together, men and women. But we do not involve men in this work. In Kenya, men are already talking about the development and change of attitude towards women. Saying what is wrong, what is inhuman. Women should also change their way of thinking and build the sense of value of men, accordingly. 

Responsibility of the community for people who live in it. The power of your own culture

In Zanzibar, we care for each other. There are many mosques here, each district has a mosque. Every household when they cook a meal they send a plate, whatever they cook, to the local mosque. Nobody tells them to do this. Every homeless person will always receive a meal from the mosque. Nobody can go hungry. This is a basic but silent rule, no one will say it loudly to you. People just do it. This is a custom that has been around for years. Another thing which nobody tells you about is that every location has a meeting around the 15th day of Ramadhan. All neighbours will come and discuss which child needs help because on the last day of Ramadhan, all children wear new dresses and new shoes. The society wants to make sure that no child goes without new things. She becomes the child of the community, this child has a mother and a father but she becomes the responsibility of that community. And we talk about taking responsibility. And people say “I am providing the shoes, I am providing the dress.” They take the responsibility and deliver. If you see every child has something new you cannot tell who is poor and who is rich. The community members organize themselves, no government tells them to do that. It’s from the low levels. There is a value-based system. When my grandchildren celebrate their birthday we visit a children’s hospital, bringing them sweets. Even a little joy makes life happier. Such a value-based system is very important for those who manage it. This system of values makes man a human being.

Own identity. Mindfulness in uncritical acceptance of new ideas

I remember the 1960s, w. Women’s liberalization in the West, which also reached us. At the University of Dar es Salaam women were stigmatized because of calling for being like men, wearing pants, cutting their hair. I remember that it moved me. I felt it was not what I wanted. That, I wanted to be a woman and keep this femininity. Many African feminists have rejected that notion of feminism. We went our way. In that aspect, we are proud that we are women. Now I see the same women who called for feminism based on being like men as older, very lonely and no longer with a firm sense of purpose.  Now, I am looking from a senior citizen position and what I want to say to all women is that days are passing and at the end of the day you come back home but what for? And that’s what it’s all about. The answer must be found in yourself. Look into your own soul, where the source of our peace lies. 

Family. Time for the family

Now women are making decisions about divorce too quickly. This is not a rule. Still women who are economically dependent on men stay in marriage even when the relationship is not good. Women who are educated and economically independent, I talk about them, make decisions about divorce, sometimes too quickly. If they do not have children, it is not a big loss, but if there are children, it is sad. The family needs time for themselves to maintain bonds. Communication in the family has been broken. Nobody has time to sit down and talk. They do not sit at the table for a meal together. Everybody is busy. The love of money makes machines out of people. We still maintain family relations in Zanzibar, because this is a small island. 

A clearly defined value system. Follow your conscience

I do not know what has happened to our society and which way the world turns, and therefore the most important thing is a clearly defined system of values. This is a guide for your life. In this system of values, it is important “Not to do what you would not want someone to do to you and live like that” Even if someone hurts you, remember not to do the same to him. It is important to be courteous and share. You cannot be a materialist, creating the world only according to your own needs. In the end, the world will not pay you back with happiness.